As colorful as our culture is, dating a Vietnamese woman is equally exciting. Their Asian beauty and charm is the source of awe and it’s undeniable that vacationing here might steal your heart away. Vietnamese ladies are highly reserved so you should remind yourself of this; otherwise, you’re going to leave a bad impression.
Still, Viet women are not hard to impress. If you know how to woo their feelings, you’re not going to fumble. In the point of view of a woman, I’ll give you personal and surefire tips so you won’t mess up with your Asian love.
1. Don’t expect us, women, to make the first move
One thing you need to know about Asian culture is that we’re reserved and girls don’t usually do the first move. Somehow, we enjoy being chased and wooed but we know when to give it a chance or shut the guy off. If you like a girl, be courageous enough to tell her about your feelings. Still, tread lightly and don’t rush with the topic of marriage or kids.
Show her you’re sincere and not just a random Americano who wants an Asian fling. Bring flowers and some girl would really appreciate a romantic poem or just a straightforward confession.
2. No sex and kiss on first dates!
Many Asian, as well as Viets, value honor and pride of their families including chastity. Never forced a Viet girl to have sex with you on the first date or kiss her if she doesn’t allow you to. Doing these are surefire ways to lose your chance of dating a Vietnamese woman for the second time.
Don’t bring her into a hotel room as it will imply a fishy motive. Some women will allow you to do so, but rarely here in Vietnam. If you plan to have that one-night stand, it will never happen with a Viet girl.
3. Be a gentleman
All women, I think, would love to date someone who treats them right and tenderly. Always be a true gentleman, pay the bills, hail the taxi, pull the chair, offer help, and more. Viet women easily notice these little things and, I might say, it increases your leverage as a potential boyfriend.
Don’t fret about splitting the bills because it doesn’t work that way here. If the woman offers to give her share, don’t accept it unless she’s starting to get irritated. We, Asians, tend to offer our share half expecting it to be declined.
4. Just be yourself
No woman will want a potential partner to change his whole life just to fit into the culture. It’s okay to learn the language, try local food, or understand the culture if you’re dating a Vietnamese woman. But don’t overdo it. Just be as normal as you are and maintain your identity. Women love men who have strong resolve and belief in their cultures.
Just a tip here: retain your identity but have sensitivity in the works. There are lots of cultural differences here. Some offending things in America might not apply here and vice versa.
5. Meet her folks and introduce her to yours
If you’re truly in love with a Viet girl and wants to marry her in the future, you should sincerely meet her folks and friends. This is the biggest proof of your clean intention to their daughter and it’s also a sign that the girl is ready to take the dating to the next level.
On the other hand, you should also introduce her to your parents. We value this very much because if you don’t, it means that you’re ashamed of us. It means that you’re not serious for a long time relationship. And as you know, we’re not the type who flings.
6. Establish the proof that you can be a good provider
Viet women don’t date men who can’t be good providers in the future. We’re serious about relationships and we would want a career man to introduce to our clan. In the typical Vietnamese culture, the man is the provider of the house though it changes every time and varies from family to family.
Don’t split the bill if you’re dating a Vietnamese woman because it will look unmanly. It will also send a message that you’re incapable of supporting their daughter in the future. I’m not saying that you should brag about your money. Just be thoughtful and gentle.
7. Share your interests
Strong relationships are built in sharing common interests. It’s good if you both love art, music, dancing, and other things. But don’t fake it if you don’t have the interest in what she’s doing. Some women can understand individual differences and they’ll surely cringe on men who fakes everything up.
You can introduce new things to her and her to you but don’t press it if she declines. You should also show respect for her beliefs, ideas, and hobbies. As queer as it can be, if you really love her, you’ll be willing to accept her flaws.
8. Make sure that they feel included in your company
If you’re traveling in Vietnam, chances are you’re with American friends. Make sure that the girl feels included in your company. Some men fail to do this and make their prospective partner feel outcasted or even disrespected in the company of their friends.
One way to do this is to tell your friends that you’re dating a Vietnamese woman and they should respect her well. The cultural differences might inadvertently send disrespectful gestures. You should also talk to the girl about the things she doesn’t want so you can avoid it in the future.
9. Always move her motorbike before driving
Motorbikes are the common means of transportation here in Vietnam. If you drove alongside a Viet girl you’re courting, make sure to move her motorbike before driving. Viet women aren’t expected to do this because they will lose their poise.
Don’t wait for her to ask and just do it by instinct. This will show how caring you are as a man. If the woman declines, which rarely happens, insist again and make sure to be of help. Women appreciate this move and will really add leverage on your dating.
10. Reserve your puns in the future if you’re dating a Vietnamese woman
American humor is way different with Asian jokes. Unless the girl is fluent in English and can understand even the slightest nuances, you should reserve your puns in the future. Viet girls would likely resort to slapstick jokes and make sure to laugh at them as real as you can. We hate it when someone, especially a guy, doesn’t understand what we’re saying.
But the catch here is that you should also make her laugh. Trust me, good humor outshines good looks almost all the time. If you’re the type who can make Asian folks chuckle, you have an advantage in dating.
11. Don’t be offended when her folks ask you personal questions
Vietnamese locals are known for being straightforward. This wouldn’t be different when you meet your girl’s folks. Don’t get offended when they ask if you’re already married, have kids, how much your income is, and the worst case scenario is if you have STD.
Parents only want the best for their children and in Asia where family always come first, such questions are normal. Don’t be offended about this and answer politely. They don’t mean to disrespect you or discourage you about dating a Vietnamese woman. This is just a matter of cultural difference and you should just show how sincere you are. Don’t fake it because the elders can sense jerks.
12. Be an interesting conversationalist
I think all women love men who can carry sensible conversations. It doesn’t mean that you’ll blabber-mouth all throughout your first dinner. Always let the girl talk first, entertain her ideas, and laugh at her jokes. Don’t just talk for the sake of talking. Make this a way to get to know each other well. We really value this part and if you’re able to nail it, you have a shot for a second date.
You don’t need to talk about Vietnam war or history. Just keep the scene cool but warm. Don’t forget to compliment her dress or how pretty she is, but don’t sound like a sex maniac. Be interesting and make her truly feel she’s valued and she’s important.
Dating a Vietnamese woman is a tender and romantic event that can happen in your Vietnam visit. If you need to go back to the U.S., make sure to establish your intention of going back. Leave all your means of contact and make sure to call her the minute you arrive home. Fulfill your promise of going back and never broke a Viet woman’s heart.